eucatastrph:

The Foxes as quotes from The Good Place

Neil: Why do bad things always happen to mediocre people who are lying about their identities?

Andrew: There are way more things I hate about Neil than like about him. His stupid old clothes, his extensive secret collection, oh, and he loves exy so much. He once talked about Jeremy Knox for two hours… I timed it. And he only stopped because he saw me timing him. Granted, he laughed, and kind of made fun of himself, it was a nice moment, but still. He always winces whenever he says Riko and he tilts his head whenever I say anything insensitive, but he never makes fun of me, which is nice. He’s also understanding, and kind, and surprisingly jacked, and, oh, fork, I’m in love with Neil.

Aaron: As my mom always used to say, if a cop handcuffs you to a bike rack, there’s always something you can gnaw through

Matt: She’s so pretty, like Nala from The Lion King. And she talks so smart, like, um… Nala from The Lion King

Dan: I would say I outdid myself, but I’m always this good. So I simply did myself.

Alison: when I turned 18, I knelt in front of Princess Grace’s dress mausoleum, and I swore to uphold the Hostess Code: “I, Alison Reynolds, shall do my level best to make every event too much”

Renee: Now I’m living my truth and creating my bliss.

Nicky: I have no idea what’s going on right now but everyone else is talking and I think I should too!

Kevin: I want you thinking about exy 24/7. That means every day, you think 20 thoughts about dance every seven minutes.

Bonus

Drugged!andrew: Okay, I know what you’re thinking. Birth is a curse, and existence is a prison. But don’t think about that. Don’t be sad, you guys. Focus on something great like Drakkar Noir which I am wearing a lot of tonight. Or the Sharper Image Catalog. What can’t those guys ionize? By the way, I am feeling amazing. I’m going to do some push-ups. Then we’ll go around the room and name our favorite cheese.