Andrew has never said he loves Neil. He has never said those specific, said all too often, worn out, cliche, words. He doesn’t want to fall prey to vulnerability. So he tucks them away, deep in his heart. Andrew only takes them out late at night, with Neil next to him in bed, the covers pulled all round him. The rain patters softly and the room lit with the orange glow of passing traffic. Neither of them could sleep in darkness, where their nightmares lie, anyway.
Andrew doesn’t say the words, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t show love through his actions. The extra cup of coffee he makes in the morning, while waiting for Neil to come back from his run. The cartoons he places on in the background because neil is stuck too far in his own head, and needs something else to focus on. The cats he puts up with because they make Neil smile. He does not like that stupid voice Neil makes when talking to them. Not at all. The midnight texts when they’re in separate states and the silence in the air is too tight. The want, not need, to make sure Neil is eating enough and not stressing over idiotic things. Andrew has never told Neil he loves him, but he really doesn’t have to. Neil knows. And Neil cherishes.
The most dramatic moment during my Camp Counseling career at an all girls camp was when a girl got a letter from a friend saying that Zac Efron had died and one of her bunkmates ran out of the cabin and shouted “ZAC EFRON IS DEAD!!!!!” and the camp immediately fell into chaos girls were crying in the middle of camp and running around spreading the news everyone was yelling and the counselors had to look up wether or not Zac Efron was dead (this is a wireless camp so the girls couldn’t access the internet and check for themselves) and then get out a megaphone and be like “ZAC EFRON IS NOT DEAD PLEASE REMAIN CALM” outside of all the cabins it was insanity.
clintbbarton 